Do you think when they open your brain they can see your thoughts?
And other witty things I said while coming out of anesthesia.
My husband Josh took the liberty of writing down the list of random snippets and thoughts I had while coming out of anesthesia after my brain tumor removal surgery. After inquiring after my dog, I offered the following sentiments for who knows how long. (Probably until the pain meds started wearing off and I proceeded to have the most uncomfortable night of my life.) So, may they live in infamy. Fans of The Office will be pleased.
⁃ It’s not Houston we have a problem, it’s Houston we have no problems with no tumor in there.
⁃ Will I still be smart after this?
⁃ Did Michael Scott start his paper company? What did he do for marketing?
⁃ Happy Halloween! (Wished unto the maintenance crew)
⁃ I have the Step Brothers song stuck in my head. (The Italian ballad Por ti volare was on repeat for quite some time…)
⁃ I think she holds on to faxes.
⁃ Josh, you’re the best secretary.
⁃ Did Ghostie poop? (Another inquiry after my dog.)
⁃ My brain doesn’t like doing a high speed chase in my skull.
⁃ Will I lose my butt muscles?
⁃ What if for your birthday present was me filling the house with Lecroix boxes? (For those who don’t know, Josh is obsessed with pamplemousse La Croix.)
⁃ Is there any tumor left in there? I don’t want souvenirs.
⁃ I got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one, hit me!…. Except don’t hit me cause I had surgery.
⁃ I’m not like Regina George with a cage on my head, am I?
⁃ Do you really think Michael Scott had box seats to the Wilkes-Barre Penguins hockey game?
⁃ Do you think aliens gave me a brain tumor?
⁃ I don’t think aliens fly in saucers.
And there ya have it, folks. 👽✌🏼