Ins & Outs: My Wintering 2024
Seasonal shifts and an authentic look at what I'm bidding adieu to this year — at least, for now.
Happy belated new year my friends and distant readers. Call me jaded but I learned quite quickly you can’t plan life for sh*t. So when it comes to control, I’m learning to release bit by bit — starting with new year resolutions.
Gone are my days of lengthy must-do lists and SMART goals and setting wild intentions for the entire 12 months ahead. While these have their places, they just don’t with me right now. And that is okay.
Quite frankly, f*ck society’s demand for a life overhaul in the middle of winter. New year, new — date to remember to write. That’s all this is.
Enter, seasonal living (more below). Each of these ins and outs suit me right where I’m at, right now. Once I wrote and re-read my list, I noted the themes of coziness, gentleness. This may give way to themes that bloom and blossom come spring, activate and brighten in the summer sun. But for now I embrace my own winter: a chance to step back, slow down, and observe in the still quiet corners of this season.
Ins
Seasonal living. While January felt more like wrenching the bear out of hibernation before she’s ready — foggy, groggy — it’s now February and I find I’m slowly stirring. I’m in the deep thick of learning to embrace the rhythms of the earth as it turns, letting my energy naturally ebb and flow with the seasons (yes, even while living on a tropical island).
Staying in. Living in a vacation destination poses a unique challenge — its ability to guilt trip you constantly if you’re not “making the most of it” and adventuring outside. I’m learning it is just as necessary to wrap up in sweatpants and a fuzzy blanket, draw the shades, light a candle, and watch Lord of the Rings extended version on a Sunday afternoon.
Socks and slides are the epitome of my style — and hide the two prominent toenails I’m losing post-marathon.
Hobbies and crafternoons. Currently craving creating something with my hands that doesn’t just live on a screen. Enter: reviving my love of scrapbooking and collage-making, trying my hand at crochet.
Long walks as my workout of the day. Not the warm up, not the cool down. Ghost keeps me on-schedule with our twice-daily wanderings. I also love that duh, you can really do it anywhere.
The quick catch-up. Josh told me he never wants someone to see his name on their phone and dread answering, knowing they’ll never get out of a convo — so he’s mastered the art of the quick catch-up: a five- to ten-minute chat when driving from one place to another, waiting in traffic, etc, rather than the long calls we can always find a way to put off. Love this simple way to stay in touch — I’m adopting. (P.s. please answer my calls, I promise to be quick.)
Making friends because of your dogs. We met Natalie and Pele on a walk and the pups (and people) became fast friends.
Celebrity memoirs on audiobooks Green Lights by Matthew McConaughey, Finding Me by Viola Davis, Paris: The Memoir by Paris Hilton (she may be the brightest business person in the world) and Woman in Me by Britney Spears (let’s discuss.) Best paired with long walks or home cleaning sprees. Memoir audiobook-club, anyone?
Diet Coke in my current fave cold cup with ice and lime.
Outs
Alcohol. Whew, y’all, this is a big one. After flexing my sober curiosity since last February, I had my last sip in late August (Monkeypod mai tai, lilikoi foam) and have been off the sauce since. The feeling of waking up hangover- and hangxiety-free, dropping the extra “fluffiness” I was carrying around, and feeling clearer-headed are just a few benefits re-making this decision for me every day.
That being said — choosing to go alcohol-free a deeply personal choice. I’m not here to judge your glass of wine and love of happy hour. The title of this Substack used to include tequila, along with my weekends. But I do know how it is to feel conflicted with drinking and how it makes my body feel.
In a society where a drink is synonymous with everything from celebration to relaxation to even self-care, I found my own bold path to make the choice to go alcohol-free, day by day, through other writers sharing their sober-curious stories. I will be writing more and sharing mine in upcoming posts. Stay tuned.
Soldiering on. I’m too exhausted to keep striving. To overperform. To be okay with just being okay. To continue to push through extreme discomfort, to ignore bodily warning signs. Out, out out. Taking space, seeking professional help, asking for what I need, inviting gentleness. Healing. In, in in.
Dressing up. I’m rediscovering my sense of style piece by piece. I’m re-sorting through what I have and asking: Do I love this? Do I wear it consistently/ever? Does it fit my current body? And most importantly, is it comfortable?!
Perfect hostessing. Learning I simply cannot control the weather. And sometimes the dishes and the dog hair will outrun you.
Instagram. Clearing the channels, cutting the distractions, turning down the noise. Tbd on when I’ll return to the platform, but for now, find me here. I’m craving words, real words woven into real stories to be read on a page. And I’m aching to be the writer that writes them.